Koloa Landing

YES! This is ME! I won this trip last December! And the trip is planned for this fall!

People ask me, "How did you win that?" Well, my days are very slow, and I need quiet easy activities. Since I have felt so much better when in Hawaii, something many of us know as the "Location Effect", I started looking for trips to Hawaii to enter! I came across this one, and you could enter every day and get an extra entry for tweeting. So I did.

On Black Friday, I thought, "I should go check that contest page at Koloa Landing". I couldn't believe my eyes!! In fact, until they emailed me, I only half believed it was really me!

Koloa Landing is in Poipu, Kauai. The pictures look beautiful! I can't wait to take my own pictures and share them with you. I'm sure they will treat us very well!

Whenever we travel to Hawaii, it is super low budget. No swimming pool, no resorts. We find the cheapest rental and cook all our own food. So a resort is going to be a REAL treat!!

Watch for pictures coming in the next couple months! For now, you can visit their website if you'd like to see it! Click here: Koloa Landing

Waves

The waves have been big lately. I haven't been able to eat for over 3 weeks. This is the worst gastroparesis flare I've had in many years! I know how to deal with a flare that lasts a week. Usually they last 2-5 days. It's hard not to focus on the waves and panic. In light of that, I thought this was a great video to share today.

Find a Way Through

"Acceptance doesn't mean resignation; it means understanding that something is what it is and there's got to be a way through it" ~Michael J. Fox

Loss... Grief... Accomodate... Acceptance... Embrace..

It's a continual cycle with this illness. It takes continual effort to work through the grief and get to a place where I can adjust and embrace. And then before I know it, I'm back at the beginning.

Loss... Grief... Accomodate... Acceptance... Embrace...

The number of days I can paint has greatly reduced in the last year. I've recently discovered how much I enjoy Instagram, and editing my photographs. The picture above is one of my edits. I've only just begun learning and I'm trying to win an ipad so I can do even more with my photos (there are lots of companies that host contests with ipads as the prize). It's all a part of choosing to accommodate to my losses, accept them and find a way through them. 

Return to blogger

Wow! I can't believe it's been 7 years since I moved my blog away from blogger over to Wordpress! When I moved, it was so that I could have a beautiful self hosted Wordpress blog and include aspects of a website on it for both my art and my journey blogs.

As the years went by, I have continued to decline both physically and cognitively. I switched from a self hosted blog to a free wordpress blog. That meant I couldn't sell anything or have any referral links. That was a little disappointing.

I was recently helping my husband create a blog for a year long project focused on marriage for our church. I discovered how much more I liked blogger now and decided to begin reworking my blog and move it back here.

And guess what I found? Wordpress and blogger are not speaking. Which means I can not import all those years of blogs.

So, as I start to blog here, I'm just going to republish posts that I want to save for posterity, or that I think might be beneficial to those who visit.

I'm not very consistent in my blogging lately because it's hard work to write and put together sentences and it can cause some PEM. I'll try to blog about that later. But for now, welcome back to my blog!

And the Show Goes On!!

"Winter Sunset"
(c) M Pruitt 2008

Hurray! There is still a ton of snow, and because they plowed our street we can't get the car in and out of the driveway without also shoveling. But the freeways are clear and Nutcracker is ON this weekend!!! Bill and I volunteered to help out on Tech crew because they are short quite a few people and many newbies are working tech.

It was a slippery ride down the side street to the theater yesterday, but we made it and had a long fun filled day.

I filled in for a missing dancer during the morning dress rehearsal for the Party scene. What fun to be on stage again. But after that, along with the rest of ACT I tech work in the wings, I felt like I'd gone to the gym twice! Thankfully, everyone could tell, and they moved me to the lightboard, where I can sit in a nice comfy chair and even put my feet up if needed. (pictures of me at the light board and headset coming tomorrow)

I spent several hours laying on the floor with my ipod, but I made it through the day and the first performance went very well, with one particular dancer looking absolutely awesome! (pictures coming tomorrow)

The biggest problem for me is this, uncontrollable, exercise intolerance. The new injections I've been doing the past two months have given me a little more energy and stamina, but my cells still don't seem to be able to handle physical exercise.

I'm going to do some research so I can write a knowledgeable blog on this concept of exercise intolerance, because I know that hardly any of you reading this can understand it. I even had a friend today - who has Chronic Fatigue Syndrome - say to me, "Well of course, in time, you will feel better after exercising."

That is sweet encouragement, but in my case, just not true. Unless we figure out the cause and treat the cause, I am never going to feel better after physical exercise. It's a very different thing than being "out of shape". That's why it's called "intolerance". Not everyone who has ME/CFS also has exercise intolerance, but there is some excellent research proving how the body reacts differently to exercise in a subset of ME/CFS compared to normal people who are out of shape. I obviously fall into this subset.

Thankfully, we were able to come home early today and I am about to put on a horse movie I got for Christmas and just relax. (Hopefully I can stay awake until bedtime... we picked up hamburgers on the way home and I fell asleep in the car waiting for Bill to bring them back out to the car!)

With all this snow, I keep painting snow scenes... go figure! The painting up above is an ACEO that is currently for sale in my Etsy store (click here)
I hope you'll come by tomorrow and check out some of the pictures I have to share from Nutcracker!

Many blessings to you all at the during this last week of 2008!

My Frist EVER White Christmas!

The beginning of our Snow

Many tears were shed last weekend, as we received our first bit of snow and Vancouver School District decided to close their buildings and would not allow the Dance Company to hold their Nutcracker Ballet in the Art School Theater that they rent.

For all of you who were planning on coming, it is scheduled for this next weekend (26th -28th) same schedule - though there may be some casting changes... that's still being figured out!

But, to our amazement, it was a good decision on the school district's part. Our typical little snow storm had turned to ice and several inches of snow by Sunday.

Snowing at Dusk

Notice the path lights and the fountain... compare to the next pictures!

Even more amazing - we now have 2 ft or more and it's STILL snowing!!!! This is going to be my first ever, truly "White Christmas"!!!

Notice the path lights... this was first thing this morning and since then we've had 2-3" more.

This is just amazing... we weren't done with our shopping.... Ellen is scheduled to open Starbucks - which thankfully has changed her arrival now from 4:00AM to 6:00AM due to the conditions.

Ellen and Bill digging out the cars so Bill could skid to work... skid back to get a shovel and skid back to work and dig out the parking lot so he could park!!!

**notice the fountain?***

But Friday, Dec 26th, Ellen must be in Vancouver, at the Theater all day. The exciting part is that we ALL may be at the theatre! I might get to be Mother Ginger, or a Party Mom, or run the sound or oversee the props.... we've all volunteered to help out with tech crew and empty spots.

So... we'll see if it clears enough to get to Vancouver on Friday. If it doesn't... another round of tears is bound to burst out all over the Vancouver area as dancers have been rehearsing since Sept for this very professional production.

But as for Christmas? What fun it is to have all my children home... the gorgeous snow outside and plenty to keep us busy... our computers (LOL), games, movies etc. (I'm being summoned to a game right now!)

I'm keeping warm, and I now understand my friends in the Midwest and East who get really tired of snow!!! I wouldn't want this all winter long.

Praying you all to be warm inside and out!

Ups and Downs and Motorcyles go 'round

I used to love teeter-totters - especially this really huge one we'd play on when we went camping in the redwoods!! (if you fell off when you were at the top... you were in serious trouble!) I loved the feeling of flying high!!!! And when I hit the ground - it just about knocked my teeth out, but with all my might I'd push and fly high again!

Have you ever heard the quote from Anne of Green Gables?

"I can't help but fly up on the wings of anticipation. It's as glorious as soaring through the sunset. Almost pays for the thud."

Well... that is the perfect description of my past week! I've flown high - like on the teeter-totter... I've also thudded down to reality - but it's all worth it!

On Friday - flying high - I did a workout on some weight machines at the gym AND I walked through three stores Christmas shopping with Bill! Wow!

Then I hit the ground... but with all my might, I pushed and I soared again. On Sunday, I actually drove myself to Ellen's dance studio and spent the day with her. AND... I even took about 20 min of ballet warm-up class with the company! Wow again! (this is Ellen stretching at warm-up class)

The next day, however, I hit the ground and just couldn't find any strength to push myself up. My exercise intolerance got in the way, plus whatever else throws me low and I had several days of not feeling very well.

Slowly, I'm regaining some strength and again worked out on the weight machines yesterday. Wow do I hurt!!!

And with all my strength - I'm going to push hard to fly again and spend some time at the studio, watching Ellen and her friends in their final weekend of studio rehearsal (in costume) before they head to the theater on Monday.

Now... with all this up and down.... I'm afraid I brought up a topic to Bill at the wrong time. I decided I'd ask if I could get a little motorcycle to ride around town - so I could have some freedom on those days I feel so much better!

He laughed!! My kids laughed! Everyone has laughed and Bill has given me a definite NO WAY!

Ok... so he has a point... motorcycles are pretty dangerous - but there's no way we can afford a second car. I wouldn't have the energy for a bike and I don't want a motorized wheelchair!

He asked me what happened to wanting a convertible Miata. "I'll take it!" I told him! I looked up Miata's on Craigslist... HA... right... that's not even worth putting on the wings of anticipation for! (said laughing)

So... hitting bottom at all the teasing and laughing... I pushed with all my might to fly up on the wings of anticipation... and I changed my request. How about just a scooter (yuk - looks like an old person) or a moped??? Way easier to ride and I'd only be riding in town!!!!

Someone who has never been chronically ill for a long period of time has no idea how wearing it gets to always have to rely on others to get you places, do things for you, etc. And it's been almost more than I can bear being stuck at home in those moments when I do feel well enough to run to the post office, or the library, or to Starbucks! I can't even go by and visit Bill at work (just a mile from here).

But... though soaring on anticipation is glorious.... alas... Bill wouldn't even let me go look at a scooter I found for sale on Craigslist. I wasn't ready to buy... but I just wanted to look at it to see if it was something I really thought I could ride!

So are you all laughing too??? Well... I suppose I don't blame you! It does sound a bit silly... a 47 year old woman - who's been sick for 7 years - riding a scooter around town.

Ah... but the freedom it would bring!!!

Up.... down.... Up..... down..... sigh.

**I've put a poll on the right side of my blog... tell me what you think of my scooter idea! Be honest! :-) **

Back to Questions - Favorite Holiday

I'm finally getting back to those questions I said anyone could ask about me! That was way back in September and I only answered one out of the three that were posted! (BTW- you can still ask questions about me and I'll do my best to answer!)

I'm going to jump to question 3 from Linda - because it's that time of year.

Question: "What's your favorite Holiday and Why"

My favorite Holiday runs for a whole month! It begins on Thanksgiving Day when we spend the day as a family, eating chex mix, watching Miracle on 34th street and making a meal that lasts for a week!

At the Thanksgiving table, we not only give thanks to God for the many things from the past year, but we also begin Christmas. We always play a Kenny G Christmas CD during dinner and the kids each get a new Christmas ornament for their collections. I put them, wrapped up, on their plate. A few years back, I discovered a wrapped gift on my plate! And the past few years, they've chipped in and bought me an ornament too! (since they are beginning to leave and take their ornaments with them) :-)

Usually the day after Thanksgiving we go out looking for that perfect Christmas tree to cut down. Though, with young adults who have to work, the past two years we've had to do it on Sunday afternoon instead.

We decorate the tree together and we must have fudge and a special CD of music that I grew up with - but my kids now love - The New Christy Minstrels!

Then, the month holds those special times when we gather to watch our favorite TV specials, eat goodies, play games and.... for the past 12 years, the month of December also included The Nutcracker Ballet.

One of my friends recently asked me about Ellen and I am thrilled to report that the Nutcracker is still a part of our Holiday month! She's dancing in the Company this year, as well as working at the new Starbucks in town. She's dancing Demi-solo roles in both Snow and Waltz and she has her own Solo that is a brand new dance which is being added this year! She's also dancing my old role, Mrs. Walbridge - Clara's mother - so her Saturday's are very busy.

This year, we will try to be around the theater as much as possible - watching and helping. On the last day of performances, Bill's Dad flies in and he will join us for the last performance and spend the week with us. We'll talk, nap, take drives to see Christmas lights, eat and enjoy the week. We'll also have another special friend joining us again this year on Christmas Day.

So... why do I love Christmas so much??? Because it's family. To me, it's what family is all about, love and acceptance, playing and relaxing in each other's love. To me, it's the perfect representation of God's family and the great gift we have received as we have become a part of His family.

I have always loved this time of year. My heart has always been touched by the story of the Nativity, the lights, the music, the sounds and smells. But most of all, I love the family times!!! And the memories. The memories will last forever!!!

So there you are... my favorite Holiday!

And this year, I am feeling the best I have in over a year. I even skipped and jumped through the Christmas tree farm this year. And yesterday I went swimming! My body still has "Exercise Intolerance" (a proven fact for Chronic Fatigue patients -it's not tired from exercise - the body actually, physically reacts in litteral, negative ways to exercise.) But I don't care. I'm able to exercise again and that's the important thing. And if all goes as I plan it (hee hee) I'll be taking the first 10-15 min of ballet class on the stage during Nutcracker week!

I hope and pray that each of you are able to find this family joy that I experience every year. This feeling of acceptance for who you are, the joy of being with others, and the comfort and stability that comes from tradition. If you don't - I hope I can be the connection to help you find the fulfillment found in God's love and invitation he offers to become a part of His family.

Peace to all,

It's Tradition!

It started in 2003. I had been sick for over a year and then had a hysterectomy just weeks before Thanksgiving. I was stuck on the couch while the family took over the job of cooking Thanksgiving dinner.

While the preparations were going on, Chris sat down and we started holding the camera up and taking pictures sitting together. It was a fun for us both and It helped me keep my mind of not being in the kitchen.

We've done it every Thanksgiving since!!

This year, was the first year since 2003 that I did anything more than make the gravy (my family says I'm the only one who can make the gravy) :-) But Chris and I found a few moments to keep up our yearly tradition - though, it's amazing to see how old we've both gotten in 5 years!!!

Today, I was very thankful for my family. Very Very Thankful for each one of them - Bill, and Marie, and Ellen and Chris!

Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving too!

CPAP

Well, I was nervous, but last night I finally completed my CPAP fitting and sleep study.

I was scheduled last Thursday and ended up really sick, so it got postponed to last night. I was fitted with this very high tech, quiet and newest of the new CPAP masks! I am so thankful that I landed in such a quality place for Sleep help.

Not only is the Study center comfortable - with "Sleep Number" beds (yes I played around with the numbers again LOL) but they have a qualified technician who helped me pick the mask - will be available for questions and help without cost, and will automatically send me what I need to keep my machine clean and running well!

So... for the next four to six weeks.. I will be wearing this - every night.

Part of me feels disappointed - I had hoped my dysautonomia wouldn't come to this. But on the other hand, God has so richly blessed me that I can't be discontented and worry about the future.

So... as I am writing this blog very late - as a way of CPAP avoidance... my very tired eyes say "It's time". So goodnight - and may we all have a great night's sleep!



(and NO!!! You will not be seeing a picture of me wearing this! LOL)

Fortunately ... Unfortunately

Do you remember that children's book "Fortunately, Unfortunately" ? This little boy goes through his day with "Fortunately" - a good thing.... "unfortunately"... a bad thing. I don't remember the whole story, but I do remember...

Unfortunately, I had to jump out of the plane.... Fortunately, I had on a parachute... Unfortunately, it had a hole in it.....

And on an on!

These past two weeks I've been living this... let me give you a few examples!

Fortunately - the doctor I saw in NY had one more idea to help with my severe fatigue.
Unfortunately - it meant I had to give myself a shot everyday.

Fortunately - it doesn't really hurt and I can do it!
Unfortunately - my whole family runs when they see me preparing for the next injection.

Fortunately - IT IS WORKING!!!! Whoooo Hoooo!!!! I've had the best week and half I've had in years! I'm not healed, but my brain is more awake, I feel more like myself and I even have less fatigue!
Unfortunately - I had to have a sleep study in the middle of that time - and I sure didn't sleep well... which has thrown me backwards a bit.

Fortunately - The sleep center is such a high quality one, I got to sleep on a "Sleep Number" bed and it was as comfortable as possible with wires glued all over your head and face and things up your nose and on your finger :-) (yes... I did play with the numbers LOL)
Unfortunately - The sleep study showed that I have sleep apnea - a common development in dysautonomia.

Fortunately - It is very MILD sleep apnea.
Unfortunately - I have to try a CPAP mask - and I HATE things that go over my nose.

Fortunately - I have a daughter who works with ordering home health care items and she showed me that there are some great options that only go IN your nose - not over it!
Unfortunately - I have to go back this week for another sleep study to calibrate the CPAP. (more guk in my hair)

Fortunately - It's not til later this week - so I've had a lot of fun painting this week!!!
Unfortunately - I had a sudden and severe flare of my gasteoparesis... the delayed gastric emptying that causes stomach pain and nausea.

Fortunately - I have medications to deal with this.
Unfortunately - it's a really bad one and the meds are only lessening the pain and nausea, NOT taking them away.

Fortunately - Just as I was tempted to despair - I received a very special gift from one of my husband's co-workers. I was reminded that God remembers me and cares about me even when life takes it's down turns.

"Can a mother forget the baby at her breast and have no compassion on the child she has borne? Though she may forget, I will not forget you!

See, I have engraved you on the palms of my hands;
your walls are ever before me.

~Isaiah 49:15-16

Pondering Lifelong Dreams

(c) M Pruitt 2008
TheCreatorPalette

Autumn Song by Sarojini Naidu

Like a joy on the heart of a sorrow,
The sunset hangs on a cloud;
A golden storm of glittering sheaves,
Of fair and frail and fluttering leaves,
The wild wind blows in a cloud.

Hark to a voice that is calling
To my heart in the voice of the wind:
My heart is weary and sad and alone,
For its dreams like the fluttering leaves have gone,
And why should I stay behind?


I found this poem about Autumn and I loved the first verse. It seemed to describe the windy fluttering of the colorful leaves I was trying to depict in this, my newest painting.

But then, as I read the second verse, I was launched into deep thought. There are many times my heart is weary and sad and all alone because my dreams have blown away - like the autumn leaves.

And why should I stay behind? Ah... that's the challenging and intriguing part of this poem... what is there to stay behind for? What is there to persevere for?

Some would say - flee... escape... winter is coming!!!!

But I say - No! After winter comes spring. Death of a dream is only the beginning to new life!

With the Autumn winds blowing away all of my dreams, it makes room for the blossoming of new dreams. I have a choice... will I cling to the old dreams? Then there is nothing to stay for. Will I embrace the new dreams? Embrace new ways, new thoughts, new relationships... embrace LIFE!

I choose to persevere, discover and embrace new dreams. And if those are blown away, I know that they too will be replaced with new.

Do you think this is why God made Autumn so colorful and beautiful? So that we wouldn't despair over winter and loss, but instead, would be reminded through the beauty of Autumn, that even when our dreams are blown away, new dreams will begin to bud?

Walking on Water

It's time I finally write this blog!!!! (and it's taken a week to get it done!)

I need to get this blog out because so many of you prayed for us and are waiting to hear how things went after the loss of Bill's Mom.

Secondly, I need to write this for myself - to remember and record what amazing things God has done for me! (especially for those hard days - it helps to go back and review the goodness and graciousness of God in my life!)

We had all been preparing and yet not really knowing how or when we would need to travel back down to California.

When Mom passed away Monday night, we quickly began making plans. We decided Bill and the kids would head out on Wed morning for the 11 hour drive. They arrived about dinner time on Wed. I stayed home, trying to carefully use one more day to rest. I would fly out Thursday morning and return Friday night.

I was hoping I would feel better, but instead, I felt worse on Wednesday. I sat in my recliner, with my PJ's on all day, trying hard not to cry (crying messes with my ANS system and makes me feel even worse). I knew I was so bad, that not even my special meds were going to make a big enough difference for me to survive the travel and all the energy I would need for all the "people time". I needed a miracle.

*****
I have always enjoyed and identified with the disciple Peter in the Bible! His faith challenges me. But he also gets himself into trouble with his strong opinions, quick speech and his instant responses. It reminds me of myself.

But Jesus loves Peter and even calls him a "Rock" - a solid person, whom he can rely on. Jesus uses and refines these characteristics, that often got Peter into trouble, and turns them into useful strengths.

One such moment, was the night that Jesus needed some "alone" time, so he sent his disciples off in a boat ahead of him, to cross the lake. After his time of prayer and solitude, Jesus, walks across the lake to catch up and meet his disciples on the other side! But they see him and begin to freak out thinking he's a ghost.
He calls out to reassure them, and Peter's instant response was "If it's really you, then tell me to come out of the boat and walk on the water with you!"

Jesus does! and Peter does!!! For a few seconds.... and then the reality of what he's doing gets the better of him and he looks down and begins to sink instead of having faith! But Jesus took his hand and lifted him up and they walk back, on the water, to the boat together!"

*****
You don't know how many times, as a young child, I attempted to walk on water! I would run to the edge of the pool and see how many steps I could take before I sunk! What a silly sight I must have been!

But, last week, I walked on water!

Well, not literally - but the miracle I experienced was just as good! Read on!!!

Wednesday night, as I pulled myself to bed, I prayed for God's mercy to give me strength for the two days ahead - whatever that meant to Him. I put my hand in his as Peter did and I went to sleep, feeling a bit nervous, but also very peaceful. I had the best nights sleep I've had in months.

I awoke to my very early alarm at 6:00AM. (Now to fully appreciate this miracle, you must understand that, not only was I at my worst physically, on a normal morning I can't get out of bed until 9:00 at the very earliest and that's if my Sweetie has brought me tea and lots of fluids to drink! More often I'm in bed until 10 or even noon.)

I awoke feeling refreshed. (this never happens on a normal day) I got up and started the water for my pot of tea. When it was made I took the tray back to bed and spent an hour drinking a whole pot of tea for the fluids and then I took my extra meds. I was amazed how good I felt! An half hour later, when the meds should begin working, I took my shower, (it had been a week since I'd been able to wash and style my hair) got dressed and was fully ready to go when my ride arrived!

I took my wheelchair with me, but when I got there, I was going to miss my plane if I waited any longer for the airline to provide someone to push me. So, I put my bag in my chair and pushed it myself all the way to security. Then I sat and wheeled through security, then walked all the way to the gate! I got there just in time to get some coffee for breakfast and board the plane!!!

I was tired from the walk, but I thought, "Wow! Thank you God for such a miraculous beginning to a hard two days!" Little did I expect that he would hold my hand and we'd walk on water for the next 48 hours!!!

I could go on and on with details of each and every miracle I experienced. We had good times with Dad and sad times. We cried, we laughed... we gathered as a family and even enjoyed an early breakfast at an Austrian pastry restaurant just before the service on Friday.

Then, we all separated to do our last preparations before the service. The kids and I stopped by a florist (one I had delivered flowers for when I was in college) and I bought one blue Iris and one Yellow Rose. They wrapped them separately for me, and without knowing what they were for, they put pink tissue around the blue iris for me. I had bought it for Mom's graveside service. The yellow rose was for a High School friend, who is buried at the same cemetery. (a yellow rose for "Friendship Forever")

Then the kids and I headed to the church. The service was wonderful! We sang some of Mom's favorite hymns, three family members shared - Bill's oldest sister, one Grandson, one Son-in-Law and I had the pastor read a tribute I had written out. The service ended with a fully kilted Scotsman playing "Amazing Grace" on the bagpipes. We followed him out and then the rush of greetings came!

The best part of the whole greeting time was seeing our best friends, John and Lieschen. Lieschen and I have been friends since 6th grade and were roommates for 2 years in college. But as friends do, we had all become lazy and busy and lost touch. I just soaked in the warmth of their presence and, for me, it was one of the best parts of the day. (I think I stood up for over a half hour talking... You KNOW how miraculous this is for me - "walking on water")

Then the family headed to the graveside service. I was getting a bit tired and took hold of Dad's arm, and sat up in the front with him. On the other side of me was one of Mom's sisters, whom I've only met once, but we instantly connected and held hands through the service. (a very special piece of this miraculous day)

I left the blue iris wrapped in pink tissue on the casket as people began to leave for the meal that would be served back at the house. Then, Ellen and I began to search for Brent's grave. My memory did not serve me well in finding it, so I'm glad they had a map.

Brent was a good friend through High School. He challenged me in my tennis game and taught me a lot. He was my favorite TE for our HS football team. He was the first person my own age who would sit and talk for hours about deep spiritual things. His Dad became very special to me too - as the Young Life leader in our town. (we called him Papa-One-Kanobi... it was the original Star Wars era *smile*) One summer, Brent, my Uncle Ted (who is 10 mos older than me) and I had more Table tennis competitions than I can count. Brent died young. After serving four years in the airforce, he was studying at the ministry school in Texas, started by Melody Green in honor of her husband Keith Green. One night, there was a car crash near the school. Brent ran to help and in the dark, stepped on a downed power line. I look forward to seeing him in heaven... I bet he has a tennis court reserved for us! (*smile again*)

I found his marker - Daniel Brent Buchanan - and cleared the weeds from the stone, stuck the rose deep into the ground and thanked God for the memories and for the hope (knowledge and confidence) that I have that I will see him and his Parents again. (Bob and Nancy Buchanan,- his parents, died several years ago in a car accident) Then Ellen and I headed to the house for the family gathering.

The house was packed!!! Family, friends and relatives!!! I really enjoyed seeing my Nephew's baby son and another nephew's beautiful little girl, and a very special niece that I hadn't seen in a long time. It all whizzed by too fast and the next thing I knew, Chris and I were leaving to catch a flight home.

Chris flew home with me because he had an important Retreat that started Friday. He missed the bus, but two of the leaders waited behind to pick him up and take him to the retreat!

It took a bit of winding down before I could sleep that night, but once again I had a fantastic nights sleep and in the morning.... I awoke... and the miracle was over. I was back to my same sick self.

But somehow, it didn't matter. God had done more than I had asked or expected. I will always cherish the memory of those two days and all that they held.

I love my husband and I love his family - which is, and has been, for a long time - my family!

Thanks for letting me share this huge journey with you, in what is probably the longest blog I've written yet! *smile*









And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with him the believers who have died.
I Thessalonians 4:13-14

Mom - Ada V. Pruitt - We loved you with all our hearts!

Thank you to all of you who prayed for Bill and I and our trip last weekend.

With two days of IV fluids and the help of extra medication, I did make the trip. And I am very glad I did.

It was hard seeing Mom so ill, but she put her last effort into our visit - pushing herself to talk and whisper and even ate some potato soup and chocolate milkshake for me!

We saw a few moments of the real mom behind the Alzheimer's and the sick body, which was a joy. But when it was time to leave, she had spent it all and we were not able to communicate with her. It was hard to say goodbye.

We did have some good time with Dad - took him out a few times and he got a great nights sleep that night.

However, when we left she was unresponsive. By the next morning she was running a fever and Hospice said her organs were in the process of shutting down.

Mom passed away last night. It was peaceful and painless and she is now in charge of hospitality in heaven! :-) We're all glad for our hope in Jesus and our confidence of her eternal life with Him.

Now, we face the trials of traveling again this week, facing and talking and serving the many people who will be grieving her. Bill was born and raised in that church and I attended it from the time we moved to Davis, so there will be a lot of people to talk to and a lot of work to do.

And of course, the whole family is tired and emotionally drained already. Dad needs your prayers. Bill is so good for his Dad, and I know Bill's presence will bring him comfort. But he's still grappling with letting go.

Please pray for all of our plans and travels. Some or all of us will drive the 11 hour drive. I may fly and shorten the trip as I am still recovering from last weekend. And we'd like to get Chris home for his High School retreat if possible so we are looking into Alaska Airlines Bereavement fares.

Yes, I will get back to the questions when I recover from all of this. But for now, let me leave you with some words from Isaiah.

Those who have been ransomed by the Lord will return.
They will enter Zion singing,
crowned with everlasting joy.
Sorrow and mourning will disappear,
and they will be filled with joy and gladness.Isaiah 35:10

Crash

I'm sorry for my slow answers to the questions that have been posted.

I've had a sudden and very deep crash this week. My whole body system is "off" but most of the fatigue is like nothing most people can imagine. Even I forget how bad it can get until it does!

I get some IV fluids today and tomorrow. Our plans were/are to fly down for one day and one night to see Mom and Dad P.

Mom continues to hang on, but they say it will only be a couple weeks at the longest.

I hope so much to take this trip, and maybe with the IV's and lots of meds I'll be able to do it - but I know that will mean a major crash again when I get home.

Pray for us to have peace over God's direction. I think of one of my favorite verses from Question 2: It is Psalm 23. I've never been very good at memorizing, but my 3rd grade Sunday School teacher was patient with me and I memorized it and earned my pack of lifesavers. That Psalm has stuck with me all my life.

1 The LORD is my shepherd, I shall not be in want.

2 He makes me lie down in green pastures,
he leads me beside quiet waters,

3 he restores my soul.
He guides me in paths of righteousness
for his name's sake.

4 Even though I walk
through the valley of the shadow of death,
I will fear no evil,
for you are with me;
your rod and your staff,
they comfort me.

5 You prepare a table before me
in the presence of my enemies.
You anoint my head with oil;
my cup overflows.

6 Surely goodness and love will follow me
all the days of my life,
and I will dwell in the house of the LORD
forever.

We are walking in a Valley right now, but the LORD is my comfort. He is rest for my tortured soul! I am so thankful for this Psalm of King David's and for these reminders of who and what I really have!

Thank you for your prayers.

I will post soon. Either when I get back, if the LORD is willing to get me to a place that I can travel, or while Bill is away. Because he needs to go and see his Mom, whether I can go or not.

Much love to my readers!
~Melanie

Friendship

If one falls down, his friend can help him up.

But pity the man who falls and has no one to help him up!

Ecclesiastes 4:10

(c) M Pruitt 2008
for sale on Etsy

I've been thinking about friendship a lot lately. Being so isolated due to my illness has changed the the way I can relate to my friends and the type of friendship I can have. But it hasn't changed the fact that I need friends. And it hasn't changed the fact that I have friends.

But the friendships have changed.

I have new friends - very close friends - though we only talk over the internet and never meet face to face (well... I met one face to face last year! ) :-) Some, are sick like me so we can go a long time without talking depending on how each of us is doing physically, but when we do get back to our emails and chat - we pick up right from where we left off.

Some of my new online friends are artists, some are Christians, and some are both. Some are older than me, many are my own generation, and some are much younger than me! None of these friends are stuck at home, in a relciner chair like me, but we network, and chat and have a good time together! Sometimes they get busy and we don't talk for quite a while, but when we do get back to our emails and chat - we pick up from where we left off too!

Some friends loyally send me mail. Some say "Hi" on MySpace and Facebook. Some call me and tell me they will be out and about today and ask if I need anything from this or that store. One friend brought a whole teatime to me! Some email me pictures of their ultrasounds, some buy my art, some leave me messages here on my blog.

The other day, a friend did something unexpected and very touching. In the middle of a busy room, she detected my distress as I tried to act normal going through the process of my parental responsibilities. She quietly walked up from behind, and whispered "It doesn't look like you're doing very well today." I tearfully admitted I wasn't. She didn't say anything, but quietly bowed her head and softly prayed for me. Then she went on with her work. I was deeply touched.

Many of my friends write me emails and ask for prayer or advice. I love that. Friends share their good news and their bad news. Friends serve each other - in whatever ways they can. Friends recognize the efforts of the other - even when it falls short of what they had hoped for. Friendship is giving and receiving!

And distance - either time or physical - never destroys friendship. I have a friend who is very near and dear to my heart, but she and I haven't spoken in, probably two years. Not because of problems, but just because of our life's circumstances. I sent her an email the other day, and immediately, we were back to the same friendship we'd enjoyed years before!

No matter what... a friend is a friend forever! Friendships may have huge times of separation, or change as life changes - but a true friend is always a friend!

To all my friends from long past days - friends I haven't talked to in a long time - to my newest online friends, I want you to know that I love you and value your friendship and the memories we share.

This piece of art I created this weekend is dedicated to you!

The Deer Return

The deer returned - unfortunately, they did a little munching on their way to my back yard (roses are in the front and side yard) I'm dreading going out this morning to see what damage they have done.

BUT... I did get pictures this time! LOL

This time there were only 2. One hid behind the Oak Tree - looking very suspicious at me. The other decided it was a perfect chance to pose for pictures!

I wonder if there is a fawn hidden up on my hillside?

Any Huntsmen/women interested in guarding my roses? Oh... wait ...we're within city limits... sorry Carla! (wink)

24 years

Today is our 24th Wedding Anniversary. (Don't we look young in this picture???)

24 years ago - we were just arriving at a little cabin in Inverness, CA (on the coast) and Bill was coming down with a very bad cold!

Tonight.... Bill is coming down with a cold!

How many times has this happened on our Anniversary? It's happened so many times it's almost funny! I guess that's what we get for getting married in February! Thankfully, we've had cold-free anniversaries so I know it's not psychosomatic - hee hee.

What an amazing thing to look back at life and think of having spent 24 years growing up together. We're not thrilled about the health challenges the past 5 and half years have brought, but we're thankful to God for bringing us through them - still strong in our love and commitment to one another!

Just wanted to share!





PS: Just 2 more days to enter the drawing for a free ORIGINAL artwork by, yours truly! I can't wait to see who wins!!!!

Tummy Flare

(c) M. Pruitt 2008
"Candy Hearts" Needle Felted ACEO
created as a request from an eBay customer

Oooooo...... Owwww..... Yucka! It's been quite a long time since my stomach has flared up!

For a year or so, it seemed to flare about every 2 months, but it's been much longer than that this time. But, though it's been a long time, it doesn't make it easier to accept!

What is a "stomach flare"? Well, with my autonomic system not functioning correctly, my stomach doesn't receive the correct messages to empty. This is a constant problem and I deal with it through adjusting the types of food I eat and with medication that stimulates my stomach to empty. On most days, this is enough to remain comfortable.

But occasionally it gets worse. Sometimes it's because I ate the wrong things, and sometimes I have no idea why! When it flares, I get a lot of pain and nausea. Sometimes it lasts a day or two and sometimes it extends so long that I have to ask my doctor to order IV fluids for me here at home.

I deal with flares by taking pain meds when I can't stand the pain anymore, and nausea meds. The pain meds have to be avoided as much as possible, because they slow my stomach down more. The nausea meds make me feel totally wiped out and sleepy - in fact the side effects often last 24 hours or more.

It's also very important for my body to stay very hydrated. Hydration keeps my blood volume up which helps with the tachycardia and getting blood back to my head. Hydration and blood volume are also controlled by the autonomic system, so this is why sometimes I need to get IV fluids.

So, of course, I would greatly appreciate all of your prayers. I know I'll get through this spell, like I do every other one... but it sure is uncomfortable.

You may be wondering how I could post such a cheery picture when I feel so icky! Well, I decided to open this post with this new needle felted ACEO because I live like this - a foot on each side of the fence. One foot on the side of joy, peace, contentment and love - and one foot in pain and physical yuckiness.

It's not that I don't struggle with emotions brought on by the physical distress - I often do. But, read my last post! I was sick and alone and needed a hug. God met me, right where I was, and touched my heart, allowed me to create, and even sent extra hugs through friends!

I guess it's a strength of Hope. Hope in God's goodness and a hope that all is not lost - even in the midst of pain and suffering! I have these verse on my computer desktop right now and they continually renew my mind and my emotions through this roller coaster of symptoms.

Psalm 42:4-5

These things I remember
as I pour out my soul:
how I used to go with the multitude,
leading the procession to the house of God,
with shouts of joy and thanksgiving
among the festive throng.
Why are you downcast, O my soul?
Why so disturbed within me?
Put your hope in God,
for I WILL yet praise him...

Nice Matters

I was sent this beautiful award, quite some time ago. It comes with the requirement that I pass it on to 7 other bloggers, whom I will list at the end of this post.

But first, I want to tell you about the special lady who sent it to me. Her name is Amy. She came into my life, and I into hers at a very unique time.

I was new at being a Pastor's Wife, and Amy had developed an online ministry to Pastor's wives. It met many needs I had and I enjoyed the conversations among my new online friends.

I first met Amy face to face, at a Pastor's Wives Retreat. We'd only talked online, but we planned on rooming together, along with two other online friends. Amy and I hit it off and I remember the hours we spent sitting in an old cabin, sharing our fears, our dreams and crying together.

We watched each other grow and we watched as God amazingly brought our dreams to reality!

And then...suddenly... to my great surprise, we've been watching and grieving for one another as our dreams... those dreams God had amazingly brought to reality... we taken back away from us.

Our losses are very different. But I value Amy so much. I love to visit her blog and read how she processes every day, her ups, her downs, and her continual pursuit of God. She finds great joy in life - which I hope that, I too, radiate. But she is also honest about her trials and disappointments. I appreciate that about Amy.

Thank you, Amy, for being a part of the many places I have traveled in life since we first met. And thank you for sharing your life with me and allowing me the privilege of knowing you.

And now.... on the the "Nice Matters" awards! First of all.. you may want to visit Amy's blog.

Second - I pass this award on to several very special people, and blogs that I often visit and enjoy reading.

Here's the description of the award:
“This award is for those bloggers who are nice people; good blog friends and those who inspire good feelings and inspiration. Also for those who are a positive influence on our blogging world. Once you’ve been awarded please pass it on to 7 others who you feel are deserving of this award.”

Katey - my Blueyeduck friend, an amazing artist, encourager, and great blogger!

Patti - a sweet and tender soul I've met on eBay. Her art warms your heart and her love warms my soul.

Amy Weber - one of my favorite artists (she allowed me to do a collaborative ACEO with her!)

Kathy Jurek - A watercolorist I greatly admire!!! I enjoy her blogs too!

Emily - a dear friend I've made online and hope to meet face to face one day. Emily also has POTS, caused by Lyme Disease. You'll learn a lot about the struggles of living with Chronic Illness from reading her blog.

Christine - her writing is as beautiful as her art!

Laurie Pace - I do not know Laurie well.... and she doesn't know me at all. But I admire her art often and her blogs are inspiring and encouraging!